Advice from a Dominant

I’ve been writing books since I was five – yes five years old. Of course, my books have changed quite a bit, but I remember doing research in various ways from early on. That’s what professional writers do – they research. And I’ve enjoyed the heck out of it, including learning more about D/s lifestyles. I have one particular male friend I’ll call JP. He’s only been a practicing Dominant for a few years so it’s been wonderful to see his journey.

Advice. I think we all need some on a regular basis. Some of us have mentors in our domination love sayingprofessions or perhaps while we were in school. He or she can give credence to issues or simply tell their story while offering support. Some also engage in helping with discipline, whether for the mind or body. When couples or a man or women alone decide to enter into a D/s (Domination and submission) relationship, my belief is that they certainly should have advice from someone who’s explored even for a brief period of time. For many who long to submit or dominate another, they feel out of place, alone in the world. Well of course, they certainly aren’t.

BDSM and the various aspects are growing in household between couples and singles. This isn’t simply because of the popularity of Fifty Shades. Many long for increased passion, nurturing, and yes, even discipline.

I had lunch with a couple of girlfriends the other day and we were talking openly about the D/s lifestyle. I’ve mentioned in a previous blog that one of my friends surprised me with a text one Sunday evening. She asked if I could find her a particular color of flogger. I choked, re-read the text then laughed. Why? Because not in a million years would I have anticipated she hungered to even try anything remotely kinky. She’s ultra conservative and had never really asked me any questions before.

What’s been confirmed since that sunny evening is that you never know what goes on behind closed doors – and not just in bedrooms. She has a male friend who is submissive and she decided, after many weeks of intense conversations, that she wanted to explore becoming a Domme. This can be a heady task, especially given she has zero clue what she’s getting into. She’s highly intelligent and immediately gravitated toward the realization she needs to learn everything she can before making this decision. She remembered everything I’ve shared in writing and my discussions with John Patrick and asked if she could talk with him.

I was pleased and of course initiated the call. He accepted and a week ago they talked. This wasn’t a secret conversation so both told me what was said from their point of view. As with any situation between a man and woman, the sides can be filtered in a different manner. In talking with JP, he said she was very open and honest about the fact she knew little. He felt she was looking for affirmation that what she was attempting was ‘okay’. He assured her she wasn’t alone and that entering into any phase of the lifestyle is joyous, but certainly daunting.

He went on to tell me he expressed how important it was for her to be patient with herself as well as with her male friend. He could sense there was a very tight connection between them and encouraged her to continue asking questions, as well as reading everything she could get her hands on.

I found out during lunch, my gal pal and her guy aren’t romantically involved. They are friends, but she also mentioned connection is strong. The reason is that he can be himself with her, telling her aspects of his needs as a submissive he feels uncomfortable doing so with many of the women he dates. Let’s face it, the majority of women see men as a strong being, even if they don’t want them to be dominant every day. He has basic fears as we all do of being accepted.

What I found so interesting during our lunch was that JP stressed to her constantly the word ‘communication’. He told her candidly that he and I could talk for hours more openly than he has ever been able to in his life. This is very true. There were no masks. We left ourselves wide open and vulnerable, but in doing so, learned very quickly how much trust we had for each other. And this is all for research – as well as friendship.

She was very impressed with the time he took, his caring attitude and how strongly he felt about the lifestyle in general. For many, including aspects of D/s or BDSM is about spicing up an already existing coupling. In the case of my friend, she has no desire to take the domination to any other level than time spent together – without being a full time couple. The challenge for her is that she’s not certain how far she can take their belt around throatdesires at this point. I understand very much why she’s a bit hesitant. When you dabble in D/s or BDSM, this doesn’t change the fact you have to have complete trust. You must communicate on an entirely different level than you would even as a married couple. I’ll firmly stand behind this.

You can’t delve into methods of control, pain, confinement or discipline without utter open communication and deep conversations. If you do, you’ll be setting yourself up for failure. For JP, I don’t see him as the kind of man or Dom who could enter into just playtime. I know that he would enjoy going to a kink club that was vetted out and even partaking in various play, but in totality, he needs to feel the very intrinsic connection  – even love. I understand this as well and with everything I’ve learned through these conversations with him, as well as other D/s couples, I couldn’t either. That’s just how I’m made – my very soul.

For my girlfriend, she’s not ready for a committed relationship. She was married, never shared a bit of BDSM with another, and this is very new. She’s eager, but cautious. She’s curious and now more intrigued than ever. I have no doubt she’ll continue learning. As we were talking over lunch, she said he became animated when he mentioned the use of implements for discipline. He went over everything from a hand spanking, a paddle, a flogger and his favorite, the belt. I couldn’t help chuckling when he talked about how exciting the use of a belt had been for him.

I remember detailed conversations about this very topic. He advised wisely to go slow, take her time and learn how to use a flogger before wielding.

Again, I’ve said this very thing time and time again. Learn your craft as you would any other. You can hurt the body as well as the spirit if you don’t know what you’re doing. She was absolutely adorable when she admitted how surprised she was the flogger she ordered was being hand made by a craftsman. She thought a flogger was a flogger no matter where you ordered the leather strap from. Her eyes and mind opened wide when I explained how they’re made and why. As you may remember, JP has a special bag – his collection of tools he took his time in selecting and ordering. He took plenty of time learning the craft of using them as well.

I knew in asking JP to talk with her, guide her as she takes baby steps, he would find the right way to encourage as well as caution. From what I could tell as lunch concluded, he’d done just that. Is she going to jump into the lifestyle? Of course not. She’s determined to read and talk to others. I applaud her for her time and consideration as D/s isn’t to be entered into lightly.

I have to say, I’m very proud of JP for his teaching ability as I am with her pointed questions. I’m smiling still and can’t wait to hear more from her as she takes additional steps into such an amazing journey.

Kisses and spanks…

 Piper

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My Special Guest – Felicity Brandon

I have yet another fabulous guest highlighting her upcoming release from Stormy Nights Press. This is the second book in the Viking series and I must say, looks delicious. Give a warm welcome to Felicity Brandon.

THE VIKING’S POSSESSION

SYNOPSIS

After she saves the life of Prince Anders, the Viking warrior who took her as his captive and tamed both her body and her heart, nineteen-year-old Princess Aurelie of Donrose knows that she can never return home again. She will belong to Anders forever, as his bride and his possession, destined to be used and enjoyed as thoroughly, shamefully, and often as he pleases.

Though Anders has proven many times that he is more than willing to punish her bare bottom harshly for any disobedience, with war fast approaching between her brother and her husband, Aurelie puts her own life in danger in the hopes of making peace. But Felicity Brandonwhen her reckless gamble goes wrong, can Anders rescue his headstrong young wife before any harm comes to her?

The Viking’s Possession is the sequel to The Viking’s Conquest, but can be read as a stand-alone novel. It includes spankings, and sexual scenes, including some scenes of sexual humiliation. If such material offends you, please don’t buy this book.

EXCERPT

I land on the bed, eyelids flickering open and closed as the spasms of pleasure continue to overpower me. Anders shifts his weight on the bed over me, and as my lids fully open, I see him come into view over my face. His gaze is compelling and holds me to bed every inch as much as his body had done before.

“Roll onto your belly,” he commands me, lifting his body weight to give me enough room to spin as instructed.

Once I am in place, he lowers his hard body over my own, spreading my legs apart with his knees. I know just what he will do next, and as though it is some unspoken agreement between us, the edge of his large erection nudges at my wet, exposed sex.

“I need you,” he murmurs, his mouth whispering into my right ear.

“Take me,” I reply, twisting my head to acknowledge his words.

His lips find my own, capturing my mouth in his kiss as he plunges slowly into my empty channel. The scent of my own desire wafts over me, and the reality that his mouth has just pleasured me leaves me overwrought. Between our legs his hard length fills me right up to his testicles. The depth and intensity of the act the clearest sign of his possession of me yet. My mind whirls at the sensation, my mouth opening into a silent ‘o’ as he withdraws, and then slams back into me again.

There are no words between us now – language seemingly lacking the coherence required to elaborate such a connection. His mouth falls to my neck, nipping and kissing my nape as his groin flexes forward, penetrating me over and over, pushing me into a frenzy of desire. I want to speak, to call out, to demonstrate somehow the way his passion makes me feel, but I simply cannot find the will. His hardness pinions me there, grazing my nub into a flurry of new excitement, despite its recent satisfaction. I notice that his thrusts have become shorter, and more insistent, and I gaze back at Anders, marvelling at the look of agonised ecstasy on his handsome face.

STALK FELICITY

Felicity is a #1 international bestselling, and award winning writer of dark, spanking romance. Head in the clouds, you can usually find her either plotting her next book, hitting the gym, or rocking out to her favourite music. She lives to write though, and is happiest creating desire and kink at her keyboard.

Facebook:https://www.facebook.com/felicity.brandon.3
Author page: https://www.facebook.com/felicitybrandonerotica
Amazonhttp://www.amazon.com/Felicity-Brandon/e/B00CV873JK/
Twitterhttps://twitter.com/FelicityBrandon
Goodreads:https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6892310.Felicity_Brandon
Blog: https://felicitybrandonwrites.com/

Thank you so much for being here!

Kisses…

Piper

My Special Guest – Golden Angel

I have another fabulous guest today with her latest, HOT HOT HOT release. I have to tell you that this lady is truly and angel and has become a good friend. I hope you’ll enjoy and purchase many of her books. Let’s take a peek…

ARABELLA’S TAMING

SYNOPSIS

Lady Arabella Windham, sister to the Duke of Manchester, has given up on ever attracting the positive attention of Lord Thomas Hood. After discovering he still sees her as the same hoydenish young woman she was in the past, no matter her current perfectly ladylike behavior, and realizing she will never match up to his infamous list of attributes for a wife, she throws caution to the wind and becomes more reckless than ever.

Why bother being good if it’s not going to even be noticed, much less acknowledged?Golden Angel Book cover

When her return to feckless and indiscreet behavior results in disgrace however, it’s Lord Thomas Hood who is caught up in the scandal with her. With a strong-willed bride determined to make her new husband dance to her tune and a stubborn lord determined to curb his new wife’s imprudent ways, is a happily-ever-after even possible?

Despite being part of a series, Arabella’s Taming may be read and enjoyed as a standalone.

EXCERPT

Perhaps she shouldn’t have been so forward, but Arabella didn’t see the point in pretending. She understood exactly what was to happen and she was rather looking forward to it. Perhaps she should have pretending more ignorance? But where was the attraction in that?

He should be grateful he didn’t have to explain anything to her. Grateful she wasn’t horrified or shocked or disgusted by the idea. Granted, she’d been a little of all three when she’d first learned what happened between a man and a woman in the bedchamber – especially some of the salacious details her friends had let fall – but she’d moved past those initial reactions. Knowing there was inexpressible pleasure at the end of the proceedings, and sometimes before, had helped a great deal.

Their wedding night would be a good deal less fun if she’d just learned about what they were meant to do and had no idea that there would be a reward for indulging in what still sounded like a rather awkward business.

Although she was beginning to understand some of what her friends meant. With Thomas’ lips on hers, his arms circled around her waist and holding her up, one hand already sliding down towards her bottom, and the strange hardness of his groin pressing into her belly, she didn’t feel awkward at all. She felt hot, almost itchy, like her skin was too tight and she wanted to rub herself all over him. There was an ache deep inside of her, and she knew exactly what was supposed to fill it even though she didn’t know how it would feel.

His tongue slid into her mouth, his hand moving down to cup her bottom, and Arabella moaned as heat and need shot through her. It felt like her skin had become exquisitely sensitive.

When Thomas’ lips pulled away from hers, she almost protested, but instead of really pulling away he was just moving them… across her jawline… to her neck… goodness, she’d had no idea her neck was so sensitive. She tipped her head back, giving him full access to her throat, clinging to his shoulders as he left a line of burning kisses across her skin.

“What your friends tell you about tonight?” He murmured the question, his voice deep and sensual.

Arabella blinked, trying to think as his hands began to roam along with his mouth. Her breasts felt swollen and heavy and her entire body shuddered as the hand not caressing her bottom cupped her right breast.

“Um… oh my… they said… they said you would put your cock in me… in my… between my legs,” she managed to get out, suddenly feeling shy. At least, shy about using any of the words she might use for exactly where he was going to put his cock. “And maybe my mouth… my bottom…”

The hand on her bottom tightened immediately, pulling her even harder against him as he moaned against the sensitive skin between her shoulder and her neck. She shuddered as he rocked his hips against her, very aware of exactly how much he liked that idea. Arabella was almost sorry she’d brought it up – the reports from the other ladies had been mixed at best.

Yet Thomas’ reaction almost made her want to try…

Somehow the idea seemed much more appealing in this moment, while she was in his arms, feeling the full force of his ardor.

“Anything else?” he asked, practically grating the words out.

The words slipped out of her mouth then. Words she definitely hadn’t meant to say, because she still thought her friends were mad for their insistence it could be fun, even enjoyable.

“They said you might spank me,” she whispered. “And that I might like it.”

WHERE TO PURCHASE

Thank you so much for being here! Purring…
Kisses…
Piper
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